Do This & People Will Start To Like You Gyanalokhub.com

INTRODUCTION 

Still I can remember this incident. When I was little, when I was at school, one of my teachers came to our noisy classroom and she asked from us, do you know why you have given two ears and one mouth? Then she said, the reason why we have given two ears and one mouth is to talk less and to listen more. Ladies and gentlemen, when we deal with people in our relationship life, in your family life, in your workspace, if you have this quality of active listening, that can help you in many ways. This quality can help you in many ways. 

Buddha as a Great Listener

So, if you have the art of active listening, if you practice the art of active listening, you will be liked by many people, People always like to a talk with someone who is paying more attention to them, If you consider about the Buddha, Buddha was a great listener. At one time, one man comes up to the Buddha and he starts insulting him. He starts blaming him. All through that incident, the only thing that Buddha did was he listened to that person, He pald a good attention to that person and in another time, one lady comes with her son, died on her hand, and she was walling and she was lamenting in front of the Buddha and the only thing that he did was, the Buddha did was, he paid attention to that lady's suffering. He listened to that lady's suffering. So, if you can practice this art of active listening, if you can listen more and talk less, people will start to like you. Remember that. For an example, if you come up to me, if you wanted to talk about a problem that you are having in your life, and from the beginning of the conversation, if I started to give you instructions and give you the advice and my opinions about that problem, what would you feel? You will start to think like, this monk cannot understand me.

He is not willing to pay attention to me. He is not willing to listen to me. So, practice this art of active listening. So, 

How Can We Practice The Listening? 

Well, the Buddha said that all the words that we speak from our mouth is pre -processed in our mind. That means we think first all these words and then we put it into our mouth and we speak. So, if we can be mindful about what we think, what is going on in our mind, then it is very easy to control what you speak. And then it Is very easy to know when to speak and when not to speak. So, this practice is called being mindful about the thoughts is called Chitta Upasana in Buddhism, For that, the only thing that we have to do is like just sit in a quiet place and just watch our thoughts, what comes to our mind. We don't want to react with that thought. We don't want to chase behind that thought. Just Identify the thought as just a thought. That is one practice that you can practice to be a good listener. 

Showing Compassion and Love through Listening

There is another way to practice this listening ability is to engage in conversations and try to listen more to that person. So in the next conversation that you're having, try this out. Go to someone and if they wanted to talk with you, just from the beginning of the conversation, tell it to yourself that I'm going to listen to this person more. I'm going to pay attention to this person more.. That is one way of paying and showing your love and affection to the person that is in front Of That is why lending a good ear and listening to someone and sharing their suffering or problems with them is one way of showing your compassion and love towards them. So, in the next conversation, when you go through that, just listen more to them. Let them put out what is in their mind. and when they go silent, then you have to ask some more questions. Tell me how did you do that? How it happened? Tell me more about the details that happened." Then they will be more interested in talking with you and they will start to like you and love you. When you practise this, then you will get used to this active listening, and also remember, do not listen to someone just to reply to them or just to give your opinion to them.

Always listen to people to understand about their situation, to understand who the person behind these words and to understand the intention behind these words. When you do that, then you will become an active and a good listener and then you will be liked by many people. So that is all about the active listening mindful about your thoughts and listen more than you talk. Keep that in your mind.

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